DAY SIXTY-FOUR (technically Day Sixty-Three): It was quite a day of ups and downs yesterday and for no apparent reason other than it was Monday and well, I hate Mondays especially this Monday since it meant I wasn’t going to be able to sleep in and wake up to someone making me breakfast for at least a couple weeks due to all the traveling that will take place in the upcoming weeks (this weekend spoiled me a little). Not that I’m complaining about the traveling – I get to go to Phoenix, Las Vegas, and Los Angeles without paying airfare or hotel – in fact, I was also supposed to head to beautiful New Jersey at the end of the month. This trip has been postponed which bums me out for 2 reasons – 1) given I missed Vinny at the local bar, I was going to stalk out some less famous guidos for entertainment and 2) I’ll have to be in the office for at least two weeks straight. The horror! I haven’t been in my office for a full week since the beginning of the year and I’m not sure I can do it. I think I might be sick around March 26th or so. Definitely feel a tickle in my throat. Optimistic spin: I’ve perfected the “I’m sick, but I have some work to do so I’m not going to take sick day” – thing is – it’s usually true….curses! Optimistic spin try #2: I’m slowly learning how to look on the bright side of things – case in point: I was looking FORWARD to a trip to NEW JERSEY!
Given I was suffering from a definite case of the Mondays yesterday, there were more than enough things that bothered me, but I'll selectively share. Let’s start with the word of the day. Fine. There is something about this word that just bugs me. It can be used in many ways that are acceptable, but the most common use of the word is when people are saying sure, okay, or that’s works. This usage is technically defined as “all right: being satisfactory or in satisfactory condition.” Like, how was your day? Oh, it was fine. Did you like that dinner? It was fine. Was the summary I wrote okay? It was fine. How do I look? You look fine. Did you want to come over tonight? That’s fine. While all of these things aren’t negative – it doesn’t necessarily instill a sense of excitement, happiness or even of simply above average. So here’s my plea – next time you are going to use the word fine, unless you mean to say, yeah, whatever, I don't care...try to employ a different word that is more expressive. How was your day? Okay, this might be the best time to use fine actually, so nevermind. Did you like the dinner? Yes, it was tasty. Was the summary I wrote okay? Yes, it will work well. How do I look? You look beautiful (many many words can fit here – all better than fine unless of course you mean fiiiine as in looking good…but no one really uses that word, so don’t try to pass it off…just play it safe and don’t tell a girl she looks fine.) Do you want to come over tonight? I’d love to see you, of course. You see – it’s not so hard. Optimistic spin: I’ve gotten my girly bitching of the day out of the way and can now be more productive.
So I had to get some things done last night – one of them – a trip to Target. Usually, I look forward to these excursions – however yesterday, I was stylishly outfitted in a baggie Blackhawks hoodie, jeans and a ponytail and did not want to do anything, other than get a hug and have someone tell me I was awesome. Yeah, the people at Target don’t do that – and honestly, if they did, I think anyone would be weirded out and never go there again. Anyway, I’m shopping along and decide to get some self-tanner. Why not, I’m going to some warm places and hell, I’m SICK OF BEING PASTY!! Normally, I’d take a hop in a tanning bed, but I wanted to try to be healthier – you know, avoid skin cancer causing capsules of death. So I buy this stuff and try it when I get home. Seems to work pretty well. It’s one that mists on you just like at the tanning salons. No streaks it says. I wake up this morning and don’t notice any streaks. My left foot is a bit tanner than the rest of me, but doesn’t look ridiculous. It says to do it a few times – maybe it’ll even out. Then I go to put my watch on….on the underside of my wrist, in the crease I am super tan….awesome. The super fine mist must have pooled here and deposited itself on my skin to form a beautiful orangey patch. What I will call….poo wrist. I've seen cases of poo finger or poo arm from people using the sunless tanning at the salons, but have never experienced pooitis myself. Optimistic spin: It’s pretty invisible to people unless I want to show it off and I’m not one to flaunt my skinny boney wrists. But this experience has prompted me to realize some things. a) Be more careful with at home self tanner - it just as dangerous if not more so as to "professional" kind - or simply avoid it at all costs. And, b) it really isn’t the color you get from a tanning bed that makes me feel better – I think it’s the lights because my tan foot and wrist didn’t give me the boost I needed. I need sun and if Chicago is going to remain cold and cloudy, I’ll go get some artificial sun at the local LA Tan. I’m a risk taker – my dermatologist hates me. Optimistic spin: She a crazy German lady anyway, I’m pretty sure she hates everyone. Nazi blood and all.
Just to let you know though, I did get that hug yesterday and it was glorious and I did make someone smile (with a small gift I got a Target) and making this someone smile always makes me smile, so the Monday ended up much better than it began. Crazy how a trip to Target can do that for you. Who would’ve known? Optmistic spin: There are at least 4 Targets within 15 minutes of me. Someone's looking out for the sanity of my soul.
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